Advice Column for Emo Teenage Girls

[Vanion]

*In an odd turn of events, Vanion is dressed in tight, red leather pants with the top button undone and wearing a short, black leather vest hanging open across his chest. His long hair is braided and tied back with ribbons. The hilts of his swords, knives and daggers are also decorated with frilly lace and what not!*

Alright, so like, I'm here to give you other girls some advice.

*flips his hair back in the stereotypical chick fashion*

You've got problems, and I've got answers. So feel free send me your problems, mmkay? That way I can get back to doing my nails. And lets try to be quick about this, okay?

[Torrie]

I have a question about waxing.


What would be the proper way to wax?

Can you demonstrate?

[Vanion]

The proper way to wax? PuH-Lease! I thought you'd have some difficult questions for me!

*tackles Torrie and ties her up, then rolls her pant legs up as the wax heats in a bowl of extremely hot water!*

Well, you've asked me to demonstrate, and, like, I totally will! Ready Torrie? Oh, who am I kidding! I don't really care if you are or not!

*grabs the jar of wax and takes a wide popsicle stick looking thing and starts to smear the wax on Torries legs!*

Now, the fun part... for me!

*smooths the waxing strip out on the wax and waits a few moments for it to set, then tears it off!!*

Anyone need further clarification?

No?

*flips hair again*

Didn't think so.

NEXT!!!

[Nynaeve]

What brand of tampon would you recommend and why that specific one?




Nyn

[Vanion]

Playtex, because you can play harder with Playtex!

*winks and giggles*

NEXT!

[Torrie]

**Screams in pain**


 

[Mirshann Uuranor]

**Screams in pain**


 

Speaking of which, what do you recommend to relieve menstrual cramps?

[Nynaeve]

If only there was a yellow about. Damn it. They're never around when you need'em




Nyn

[Mirshann Uuranor]

*wonders why Nyn is asking herself that*

[Moghedian]

Welltheotherdayheliketotallytoldmybestfriendthath elikesmebutlastnightatKat'spartyshe'slikesuchaloserbuttotallyrichsoI'mlikenicetoher Anyway... IlikesawhimlikekissingthatliketotalslutAndreasoiw aswonderingifyoucouldliketellme... Does he like me?

[Mirshann Uuranor]

Omg.

[Jelly]

Welltheotherdayheliketotallytoldmybestfriendthath elikesmebutlastnightatKat'spartyshe'slikesuchaloserbuttotallyrichsoI'mlikenicetoher Anyway... IlikesawhimlikekissingthatliketotalslutAndreasoiw aswonderingifyoucouldliketellme... Does he like me?

...Perfect